Problem

I don't accept my smile
I don't allow myself happiness
There are too many questions
Not enough answers

I don't want professional help
I don't want to be told I'm wrong
You have all the right things to say
But there are no right solutions

I want to be free
I want to be loved
I'm chained down by this curse
Held by unbreakable chains

I want to laugh and not regret it
I want to feel something other than guilt
Confusion weighs down acceptance
Disappointment is all I know for sure

I can't find the strength
I can't dig deep enough
Motivation is lost
Inspiration to live is hidden just too well

I can't look at myself in the mirror
I can't breathe
Tears are all I have
And they're not there either

Though I will try
I will fight
Someone has to push me
My gears need greased

I will pray
I will hope
I need my time
And I need my escape

I have a problem
I have to fix it
Can I do it?
Yes I can