Call Me Crazy 17.0

Chapter Seventeen: It Was Only a Kiss
*Tommy's POV*


Ugh—bowling. Hah! League bowlers… don't they have anything better to do with their life? Honestly, who would want to ever come to a smelly bowling alley, wear ridiculous-looking, obnoxiously colored shoes, be surrounded by the loud partiers and the weird nerds, all while potentially breaking your fingers and making a fool out of yourself by slipping on the waxed floor? Apparently my idiotic friends which were actually trying to bowl backwards between their legs at the moment. I was sitting at the table with spinning chairs, staring at them like "What the hell?" But I guess I couldn't really complain much, considering this was Allyson's birthday present. Plus I was out of the house and having a decent time.

Rose and I were in theater together yesterday when she said something about how she couldn't figure out what to get Ally. Then it struck me that I didn't have anything, so we came up with this. They both like doing this, but Allyson has a thing for it. I guess even in middle school she did it every Saturday with a team, so it kind of stuck with her. And that's what brought us here. For now we had bead necklaces and a pizza to celebrate, but we promised Allyson that we'd buy her a cake and have a small party anyway. We were in the 6th frame with Ally leading (no surprise there) with a score of 82, then Rose came next with 65, and I, sadly and pathetically, was getting terribly beaten by girls, racking up a total of 37. What a man, right? But it wasn't my fault the only times I've ever bowled was when I could fit under the tables and roll the ball down the lane. The bumpers were always up too, so that didn't exactly help my aim.

The two cousins were just messing around now since it was our second game, but I was still determined to get at least one strike this whole night.
"Tommy!!" Allyson shouted over the music and others, way louder than she needed to. When a few lanes next to us on our right (we were in the furthest left corner—seems like they knew what they were dealing with), she laughed nervously and uttered her sorry. She skipped up the little ledge and slammed her hands down in front of me, grinning like a madman. "It's your turn, fool!" I rolled my eyes and laughed.
"Alright, alright," I sighed, taking a 12-pound ball and holding it up to my chest. I waited until there was a green light signaling me to go, and I moved forward, throwing the ball. It rolled down the lane fast, knocking over 8 pins. So close.
"I don't know why," Rose dramatically said, "but I thought you were going to be better than this." I shot her a half-serious glare.
"Look at me," I gestured over my skinny and short self, "I'm not exactly sports material. Not that I consider bowling a sport, anyway…" I turned around once I got to see Ally's jaw drop.
"Hey!" I ignored her offense and took my second shot, hitting both stragglers. Well a spare's not too shabby. As I walked back she poked me in the shoulder hard. "Hello! I'm the birthday girl here!" she exclaimed, putting her hands on her hips.

I took my Coke off the table and sipped it, smirking. "Yes and your point?" She gave me a blank stare.
"You are impossible, Thomas. I will choose to forget you ever said that." Ally flipped her hair and huffed, taking her turn. Sometimes I get sassy when I'm hyper and can't let out the energy, so I supposed that's what happened now. I was getting restless being here for nearly two hours, and kept fidgeting in my seat. Rose noticed and raised an eyebrow at me. Over the past couple months she's gotten to know me well and already being a good judge of character and a smart girl didn't hurt, either. So now she could just look at me and tell the area of my thoughts.
"I'm going to take a walk," I told them, standing up to kick off the hideous alley shoes to put on my own. "You guys can bowl for me while I'm gone." Finishing my drink, they let me go in agreement. I made my way up to the front doors, holding them open for a small group before I headed out to the parking lot. The first thing I did was take a huge breath of fresh air. It was so amazing!

I walked myself along the edge of the side of the building, keeping my hand lazily dragging on the bricks. The air was chilly but not as bad as it had been this past week. Adam's sweatshirt kept me warm and I pulled the sleeves over my hands, folding my arms as I rounded the corner. I didn't want to get lost so I decided to lean against the wall, flicking my hood up and crossing my legs. As I looked at the ground I let my thoughts wander. I wondered what Adam was doing right now, if he was okay, if he made friends, if he was thinking of me. It was kind of selfish of me to leave Allyson at her own party and focus on someone else but I couldn't help it. Every time I would have to wake up in Adam's bed without him there broke my heart. Sometimes I just needed to think clearly, and that was when I wasn't in a bad mood and was having fun. That was now. So I needed to take my opportunity while I still could.

Adam had written that I should have fun and enjoy my time now. Well, am I? I had to ask myself. I guess I would say that. I mean he doesn't know what I've been doing (or not doing, more like it), and I think it'd kill him if he knew. Oh, I wish I could just write him back and tell him I'm okay and that I love him. Or to even tell him happy birthday in less than a week. The date was January 29th and today it was the 24th. Five more days. That's it. I didn't even know when the next time I was going to be able to see him! What if it's way past that? What if his results don't come in for another month? I don't think I could take that. I need to at least hear his voice and I wasn't even allowed to do that. His talk time was for parents only. Though every time Leila or Eber would tell me "Adam says he loves and misses you," but I'm always in school when he calls so I never get to say it back. The only thing I have to rely on is the bond that we have that hopefully stretches as far as we need it to.

"God, Adam, why'd we have to be so stupid?" I whispered to the sky, shaking my head. Normally I would have broken down and cried but today was different. Today I was strong. There was a change in my heart that made it seal back up and beat powerfully. Even school wasn't that bad except for it just being boring school. It was like the universe changed, almost.

I watched the clouds as they floated on by. It was something I used to do when I was younger and things weren't going right. I still do it today and it has the same impact as it had. I would lie down in the backyard behind some bushes where I'd cleaned up of garbage and weeds. It was like my own little sanctuary. Too bad I was ripped from my makeshift one from someone's loud and sputtering muffler. I flipped around the corner and I froze for a second.
Is that…Adam's car?
Squinting from a glare off the hood of the machine, my heart hammered. My memory started to list
things off that would be needed to describe and interpret his Ford. Nearly everything was there: the green
color, the four doors, the tinted windows. The only major clue was that the license plate wasn't GLAM666. I sighed with disappointment. In the back of my head I did really know it wasn't him but it didn't stop my hopes from rising up. Yep. They were crushed. No, not just crushed but drowned in a pool of hatred-lava when I caught sight of who the driver and passenger were. I didn't need to stay back and see who else was in the car.

I half jogged half walked back into the alley as inconspicuously as I could; making sure that the enemies didn't see or recognize me. Once I was in the place and past the front desk, though, I was swerving in between people, keeping focus on Allyson and Rose as they high-fived each other and chest bumped. Even through this I had to find the humor in their stupidity when they were laughing from pain. When I reached them I caught my breath quickly. Allyson, folding her arms gently, gave me a confused but happy look.
"Hey, I thought you were going for a walk—?"
"Look who showed up," I interrupted Allyson, facing the wall and nodding my head backwards. She looked past me and her whole attitude dropped. At first her eyes and mouth were blank, but soon they changed and sharpened. Rose followed and looked like she wanted to bitch-slap them all. You know it's not going to be good when Hanna, Collin, and buddies pop out of nowhere.
"Ah, shit fuck," Ally mumbled under her breath. "Our luck." Rose basically growled and rolled her eyes.
"Just keep it cool," she uttered, using her fingers to spike up her hair more in the back. "Don't let them get to you. We all know what they are so we know what to expect. They don't know us," she commanded with motivation.

We nodded in agreement. I quickly checked the TV hanging up on the ceiling with our scores on it and it said that I lost, Rose came in second and Allyson came in first. It currently was asking us if we wanted to pay for another game.
"So do you guys want to stay longer and play again or should we leave?" I asked the both of them. They thought about it for a moment, Rose shooting a scowl over her shoulder. I glanced back and Hanna was staring right at me, smirking with malice with her hands on her hips. She gave a cruel wave. Collin was behind her getting their shoes and paying, leaning over the counter like a sack. Hanna tapped his meaty shoulder and cupped her hand over his ear, saying something. He looked up at us and nodded, cracking his knuckles. The fake partially-blonde girl held up her hand, signaling us to wait.
"Stay," Ally said, her voice edging on fierce, "let's see what they want."

We were standing around, giving meaningful silent looks that planned out what we were going to say and do as the rivals started to come over like they were the shit, Collin's arm around Hanna's shoulders. They all had a cocky smile and radiated of narcissism. It seemed like everything was in slow-motion, like in the movies before an epic battle scene. In a way it almost was in our world: the loners and the populars coming to the same level to settle this new-generation war of bullying and defiance. And since "violence is never the answer" (though it's the most fulfilling) why not resolve it a different way?
"I got this," Rose told us, stepping in front with me and Allyson on her sides. Hanna did the same, jutting her hip out and putting her hand on it. She used her other hand to flip her hair. For a moment both groups shared deathly stares. Rose, bursting with confidence and intimidation broke the silence. "Let's get straight to the point. You don't like us, we don't like you, so what do you want?" she snapped maliciously. Even I didn't want to be on the other end of that one.
"Just a little 2 on 2, no need to be a bitch about anything," Hanna defended, still with unfeeling eyes.
"2 on 2, huh? Fine. Allyson and me against you and Collin I'm presuming?" Rose flicked her finger back and forth among the two disgustedly.

Hanna laughed, looking at Rose like she was on drugs. "Are you serious? No, Collin here sucks." She said while jutting her finger toward him. "I think— to make it fair— it should be Allyson and Thomas versus Collin and me." I followed her eyes, and she was staring at my score on the screen. She was definitely trying to hold back how pathetic it was.
Rose raised her eyebrow. "Since when do you play fair, Miss Everyone-is-just-a-new-piece-of-gossip?"
That one got Hanna to show a little anger. "Hey, I'm trying to be civil here," she sneered. "And let's face it, we both know I would lose in a physical fight with either of you two," she continued, referring to Allyson and Rose, "but we also know that I could ruin your reputations so bad you'd have to transfer schools." A cold chill ran through me. I was about to do that but we ended up moving, anyway.

"I see your game," Rose warned, "but I get it. This is for everything, alright?"
Hanna smiled in triumph. "Yep. And let's make it interesting," she stated, holding her hand out for one of the posse to put a pink 8 pounder with sparkles in it. "If you guys win, I and Collin will leave you alone. Even in school." She said it like it was no threat, like there was no possible way they could lose. You know no taunting, no contact, yadda yadda yadda."
"Yeah, and if you win?" Allyson finally stepped in, checking on me behind her. I just shrugged with wide eyes.  
"You and your partner kiss." Hanna let the words drip out like poison, like it was killing us on the spot. And I knew exactly what she was thinking. She knows of Adam and where he's at now and why. You know, people see things and they talk. Hanna just happens to be the first person to hear about it besides the first-hander. I don't know how she does it, but she does. She's like the fly on a wall with acute-hearing elephant ears.

Rose answered for us. "Just a kiss? Simple enough." Oh, it was never that simple, hon.
"You didn't let me finish yet girlie," Hanna poked her finger through the air at her. Rose undeniably wanted to bite that appendage off. "If we win, Allyson and Tommy have to kiss. With lips."
"Yeah, we get that," I mumbled irritably, rolling my eyes at her. Stupid phony blonde…
"Ah-ah-ah. I didn't get to the best part," she giggled like she was a genius. "You have to be connected for at least 45 seconds. In front of everyone here, ya know, as evidence?" She paused and winked at me, taking directly at me for a sentence. "Or maybe as blackmail?" The blood in my veins started boiling even before she went on. "Oh—haha— and let me make it even more fun. There has to be tongue." She smirked at our dropped jaws. "Nothing more like a real kiss than a French kiss."
I shook my head. "Hell no. Oh hell no." I narrowed my eyes and pushed my allies to the side so I could get right in front. Hanna was only about an inch shorter than me so we were basically eye-to-eye. She spoke cruelly.
"Why not, Tommy boy? Afraid you'll lose? Or are you afraid of kissing a girl?" her sneer turned into a lopsided grin and she made a kissy-face at me, jerking her lips towards me so that I flinched back. I stepped closer so that there was little space to be misinterpreted.
"Bring it on, bitch."

Since we all knew the rules per say, Collin and Hanna's people started to set up a new game on the lane that was next to ours as Hanna and Collin themselves began to laugh as obnoxiously as the shoes when words were exchanged. Rose continued to scowl at them. She has a very strong opinion and she could be stubborn with things that she's passionate about, so to not potentially crush the two idiots was obviously challenging for her. Allyson just looked nervous with that red taint of anger. Then she took me by the shoulders and looked me in the eye seriously.
"Okay Tom, let's win this thing. I really don't want to get trampled on by her," she explained. She was biting her bottom lip, something she did to distract herself from something she has to do, but she was for sure ready to kick some popular ass.
"Yeah, and let's not forget about if we win," I added, watching Hanna practice her throw. I noticed she even had the leg thing down. Crap.
"Or lose." I just barely heard the words fell from her mouth as she turned away. Yeah… or lose.

"Come on, ladies," Hanna snapped at us, gesturing to the screen. "Time's wasting. Chop chop!" I shook my head, checking the TV. The order was Allyson, then Hanna, then me, and then finally Collin.
"Yeah yeah, we got it," Allyson quieted her down, grabbing a ball. "Let's all shut up and get this over with."
That was the last thing said between the two groups for nearly the rest of the time together. The beginning of the game for use started of decently with both of us getting a spare. Hanna and Collin both wound up with sixes, so we were in the lead for a good amount of time. Somehow I was doing a ton better than I was when it was for fun. I should've known because I always work better under pressure so what's the difference now?

Rose was complimenting us strategically with hints and motivating us on the sidelines on every throw. With her arms crossed, her usual hardcore edgy outfits and various piercings, and that down to business expression she was fierce and daunting to anyone that didn't know her. I even saw some of the football guys warily watch. I smiled at her and she returned it, giving an encouraging nod. It was my turn and I and Collin's scores were too close for comfort. I took a deep breath and lined up, taking a few medium strides to whip the ball fast down the lane with force. It was gliding straight down the middle until about two feet in front of the pins. With my luck it suddenly curved and only hit three pins. I heard Collins deep and grizzly laugh, making me fume. On my second try I was too unfocused and heated to concentrate and it went in the gutter. Not what you want to do in the eighth frame. I grunted at my stupidity, face palming when I made my way to our table. Allyson tried to tell me it was alright and that he could still do worse than me. I believed her since that was the case for the whole time so far. Until, that is, he went.

To everyone's apparent surprise, he got a strike. He got a frickin strike! What the hell?!
"Ah-haha!" Hanna squeaked in joy, jumping up and down. "There's my man to pull out in the end!" He smiled arrogantly and picked her up and spun her around, eventually setting her down to kiss roughly. I gagged on automatic response, looking away to wipe the tears tickling the corner of my eyes from the dry heaving. Rose laughed loudly and Allyson tried to hold back her giggles. I would have laughed too at my physical reaction but I was too busy trying not to do it again.
"Hey!" Collin shouted at me, making other's heads turn. I realized it was the first time he's said something to someone other than Hanna since he's been here. I guess we know who wears the pants in that relationship. "This is normal, not a dude with a dude. That's just disgusting." His words hurt more than I thought they ever would. I knew never to take what he says personally because he's a meathead and I shouldn't shape myself for someone else. But that hit me hard. I might even hate the word "disgusting" more than the word "fag". My heart just got shattered.

"Don't listen to him," Allyson cooed, rubbing my arm. Tears were coming up and I had to look away, closing my eyes to attempt to blank my mind from those words. Rose's demeanor changes as fast as flipping a light switch. The green in her eyes was burning like fire and she was in Collin's face like a flash.
"What the fuck is your problem?!" she growled at him, quite enough to not disturb other players but loud enough to make him jump. I looked again and his eyes were wide and Hanna was slowly retreating behind him. "You have NO right to say that to anyone!" she was furious. I have not at all seen a girl get that angry. Ever. "Who do you think you are?!" she spat, smacking him in the face. There were even marks where her rings were!
"Don't touch him!" Hanna tried to step in.
"You shut your fat mouth before I shut it for you," she warned her in all genuineness. The blonde shrunk back without another sound. "Now, I don't think this is a question, but that was a forfeit," Rose demanded.
"You've got to be kidding me!" Collin finally had the guts to say, throwing his arms down. Rose had a look that clearly said "Does it look like I'm kidding?"
"It's fine," I came out and voiced, keeping focus on the ground. "If they can't win fairly then let them be the liars they are and cheat." I knew we were losing, and we would have lost anyway, so might as well prepare for it. It was only Allyson, anyway.

Rose stood her ground, only facing me as she asked, "You sure?" I nodded weakly and she came back, hugging me quickly. I mumbled thanks.
"Get your ass ready!" Rose commanded at Hanna who nearly ran up there. I can't believe how many times I've doubted Rose and Allyson. They were the best friends I've could have ever asked for.
Ally smiled apoplectically at me, shrugging, "Sorry it had to go down like that." I waved her off.
"Not your fault," I sighed, putting my hand on the back of my neck. "They're not my problem, it's letting you guys down." Before she could protest I pointed to the lane and she went. It wasn't really that bad, but it still wasn't her best. At least Hanna didn't get any. But then it was me, and it was nearly the same as last time, except for an added pin. At this rate it was obvious who won without inspecting the stats, even when Allyson managed to get a strike and a spare in the last frame and I a 9. There was a high tension between the groups; one of anticipation and one of awkwardness. Could you guess who went with what?

With what confidence Hanna had left, she stepped up and put her hands on her hips. Out of the corner of my eye I notice* Rose staring down Collin as he sat down at the table with his mates.
"Well, you knew the deal of losing," Hanna pointed out.
"Yeah, and unlike you we'll actually keep our word," Allyson rolled her eyes. Hanna chose to ignore it.
"Okay, your countdown starts when your lips meet," she said, holding her iPod which I knew had a timer/stopwatch on from previous experiences with Adam. Not for the same reasons, of course. Hah…
"You absolutely sure?" Ally asked once again, blushing like mad.
"Nothing I haven't done before," I muttered guiltily. I swallowed once and sucked down a quick breath before I slid my hand over her cheek with my fingers just starting to weave though her hair. Her eyes switched between mine prior to them shutting. At first I only felt her hand on my neck but then we actually kissed. It was nothing like I was used to—no sparks, no lust, no intensity. But that didn't necessarily mean that it was bad. Quite the contrary.

I didn't know how long it took but quicker than I had expected we were moving on to the second phase of the deal; the t-word. I knew Allyson's first and only kiss was with me, and I don't think either of us minded that, but to be her first make out, basically? Now that was a different story. I could tell she was inexperienced but so was I, sort of, because I've never done this with a girl. And neither have I ever got caught off guard by something a tongue did. A thrill inched its way down my spine a connection and a twist at a time until I had no choice but to take over. I leant my head the other way and I swear I had no control over my body anymore. It was like my testosterone was a lion and it burst out of its cage. My free hand grabbed her waist and I liked the different curvier feel of a girl's body as opposed to the more hard and masculine structure of a guy. Her lips were a new sensation, also, with their more rounded shape and lip-gloss flavor. For a moment I forgot what a guy was like to kiss.

There was the sound of an old telephone ringing followed by Hanna's "Time's up!" I and Allyson broke away chasing oxygen. My hands seemed to be glued onto her and hers were finally realized gripping my sweatshirt over my chest. We met eyes at the same time and both jerked our appendages away. My face was on fire.
"Now look at you," Hanna slowly clapped ironically. "You just Frenched a girl and didn't gag." The sentence lingered in my conscience, making it question Do you like girls? I blinked once and half the people I was "with" were snickering and the other half was stunned. My heart pounded.
"I'll talk about this later," I mentioned to Allyson quietly. I was heading out the door before anymore questions or statements could be heard. I ran to the car Leila and Eber let me drive and sped off, clutching the steering wheel tightly. I dug deep in the back of my memory to try to mentally map out the street I wanted to go down, only using a onetime visit as my source of direction. After I thought I had it down my mind fired an automatic contemplation rifle.
So does this mean I'm not gay anymore? Am I bisexual? Was I just making up how awesome it was? Did I only like it because I haven't kissed anyone since Adam left?

Would Adam understand? Of course he would! I reassured myself. I knew he would because he hates Hanna and Collin as much as I do. But would he understand what I was about to do next…?

I was at my destination quicker than I thought. And it was later than I thought. I checked the green numbers on the digital car clock and it said it was about eight o'clock. I knew I couldn't park down this street because 1, it was too narrow and 2, it wasn't the smartest thing to do. So I turned around and parked in the Little Rock High's school parking lot that was only two streets down. I made sure all the windows were completely shut and that the doors were all locked, hiding any valuables that looked worth taking under seats. After I deemed it worthy, I speed-walked down the couple blocks I needed to go until the road named Rustic Street (lovely, isn't it?) was at my left. I slowed down once I got here, getting the chills for a moment from the rundown houses and eerie street lamps. Thankfully I didn't have to go too far to find the alley I was looking for. I built up my confidence and turned around the corner, seeing exactly who I wanted to see. My luck seemed to be riding on a rollercoaster.

He saw me but before he got to do anything but smile happily with confusion, I kneeled down on top of him with my knees on the outside of his, sitting in his lap. I put my hands on his shoulders and he wrapped his arms around my waist. His muscles felt great and that got my hopes up that I still liked guys. His eyes were flaming darkly, sexily when he stared at me, silently asking me what I was doing. I could smell the freshly sucked joint that was sizzling down to nothing next to us. I could tell it was only his first.
"Just kiss me, Kris," I murmured impatiently, pressing my chest to his. His hands fidgeted around my lower back and I could feel the way they were holding back from grabbing my ass.
"But what about—?" I wouldn't let him finish the sentence because I knew that I would back out and I needed this. I smacked our lips together hungrily, wrapping my fingers around his thick neck as the others ran through his silky short hair. His own hands didn't fight anymore and one slipped over my jeans pocket, squeezing me quickly. It caused me to gasp and he pushed his tongue in my mouth, moaning softly. The funny thing was no matter how rough or gentle he did something that would normally drive me crazy, no matter how long it went on or what his hands were doing it still came as a close second to Allyson's sweet and innocent 45 second lip-lock.